Ah, not Greg!

I had the opposite of Greg today.

I HAD to go to “my” Post Office to pick up an envelope that was sent registered mail. Since I have been coming in to the office early all week, and knowing what kind of line develops at that place during a standard lunch hour, I set off after my 9:00 to 10:00 AM meeting ended and arrived at roughly 10:20 AM.

There is always a line. And the two counter staffers moved with absolutely no urgency and more than a little officiousness. Well, now that was an understatement. Apparently neither one of them got the memo that we now have choice in most of our Post Office transactions.

“Choice?” you ask. Why, yes, Choice (with a capital “C.”) And not just for packages. You see, I can get stamps just about anywhere these days. And I hear that at Costco, I can get them for a discount off the face value. We can even go, as I do, to another Post Office where Greg has turned service into a conversational art form.

But there are other choices that the Postal Service (USPS) may not understand are competitors. There is email. Who wants to pay that ever escalating charge for a stamp when you can use free email? Then, there are products like “Bill-Payer” which allow us to make electronic payments without ever licking another envelope. Oh, and couriers.

UPS and FedEx are so well entrenched in the package industry that I cannot imagine why you would want to use USPS – unless the extra couple of bucks is going to break you. And I read that USPS now uses UPS to transport those packages for them – and that they recently switched from FedEx planes – or is it the other way around? (Who cares? It isn’t USPS. It is someone else. They apparently can’t fly economically.)

The line was better than usual for the South Jordan Post Office -12 minutes at 10:20 AM. The wait while they found my letter was 7 minutes. And I am sure, by the speed the person was moving, that she didn’t actually take a break or have a smoke while looking, for at that rate, a cigarette would have taken closer to 20-minutes!

There were people spread out all over the place completing the things they had not completed properly prior to getting to the front of the line (obviously not intuitive!) And I especially loved the sign that tells you that “In accordance with Credit Card Company Policies, we will not accept a credit or debit card for payment that is not properly signed.”

That sign used to say, “In accordance with Federal Law …” Apparently they figured out there is no such law. I can hardly wait for them to determine there is no Credit Card Company policy against signing your credit card “See ID,” or “Check ID.” Most signatures are unreadable anyway, and if one guy I know can sign his with an “X” then why not a “Check ID.” And if the signatures don’t match, they are supposed to ask for ID, not refuse the transaction. Hmmmm.

The only thing I don’t know about the sign is whether it is on the wall at the West Valley Post Office where Greg works. Want to know why? Because with roughly the same number of people in and out of the Post Office, and the same number of people waiting on them, I wasn’t there long enough to note the time on my watch or to spend much time looking for signs.

Not only were they pleasant – but Greg and his co-workers got it done. Fast! Faster than Wendy’s. Well okay, Faster than Wendy’s before Dave died. But, you know what I mean; it was that kind of Fast!

And the officious thing sitting at the counter next to the person waiting on me commanded customers in a voice that was clearly something out of the officer corps of the US Navy. I wonder if it is the uniforms. Ah, memo to Counter Staff – this is not the military and you are not officers. Sorry.

I’m thinking that the South Jordan Post Office needs to take their people over to the West Valley Post Office for a dose of Greg. Who knows, maybe even they can figure this thing out.